A heavy volume bound in skin.—In-game description
The Perfect Murder is a detailed guide for planning and committing a murder. Reading this book advances 
The Councillor's Wife.
Text
| “ | KICKING ANOTHER'S BUCKET: Planning the Perfect Murder by Winner of the Assassins Guild's Brass Knuckle Award. PREFACE So you have determined to take a life. My sincerest congratulations. Savour this moment, friends; taste the sweetness of the feeling that grows in your belly. Soon, you will have sent a soul flying into the ether. Your hand alone will have caused the fabric of existence to have undergone a permanent and undeniable change. You are preparing to undertake the most exquisite endeavour of your life, and you'd be remiss not to luxuriate in every surrounding moment. CHAPTER THE FIRST: Selecting your target There are several questions to consider when determining which life is best to seize. The following are but a few to consider: Is the head of your intended victim sufficiently round and symmetrical to make an impressive mounted trophy? Does he or she have hair of sufficient length and health to spin into a lovely yarn for darning socks or throw rugs? Will his or her hide provide for supple shoes, bags, and belts of a colour that suits your eyes? CHAPTER THE SECOND: Choosing a modus operandi. Selecting the method with which to carve, strangle, or pierce your victim is in itself more a matter of art and of soul than of fact and science. Arrows are fine for sportive types. A dagger turns the carpet red as a valentine. Suffocation behoves lovers and mothers. Poison complements a bitter heart. In the end, select a method you believe best accomplishes the moral and spiritual effects you desire. CHAPTER THE THIRD: Execution The most important and delectable step in any murder, dear reader, is the moment of execution. By this I do not mean the brute force of the violence, if a violent method you have chosen, or the interim (ever agonising) between the administration of poison and the first sign of its effects. No, the moment to which I refer is that precise event when life flees from the victim and the eyes transfigure: light to dark, flashing to still, bright to dumb. This is the holy minute, the minute when the act materialises, complete - no longer planned or attempted, but completed. This is the moment during which you write your name in the sky, for you have done something that, like the stars, cannot be undone. CHAPTER THE FOURTH: The Afterglow Now, the moments after the execution are hardly the time to worry about practicalities; no! This is your time to quietly reflect; to enjoy your transformed self, your transformed place within the cosmos. Make yourself a cup of tea, if you please, or light a pipe. The details can wait. When you find yourself fully refreshed, you might consider what to do with the once-person whose remains you must now inter or preserve, as is your pleasure. The easiest and most classical means of disposal is, of course, to bury the remains, but think long and hard about precisely which remains to bury. The civilised among us know full well that waste is a sure sin, so if there is yet some function that may be wrought from the once-person's remains, it is so imperative that you do so. Might not a family of beggars appreciate a meaty rack of ribs? Might not a local tanner, down on his luck, thank you for a length of virgin leather? Do you not deserve some special token - a keepsake - for your labours? Once these matters have been attended to, you might concern yourself with removing the dregs of your efforts from your sight. A freshly rained-upon bog is ideal, though a freshly dug grave in your local cemetery will hardly notice a bit of additional rubbish tucked in below the intended casket. EPILOGUE If you have successfully completed your endeavour, you might find yourself wondering after and planning for the next. This is a natural and desirable result of executing, as you have learned, the perfect murder. The author wishes you luck and satisfaction as you explore your newfound passion. Remember: Until you've reached a dozen, you've hardly scratched the surface. |
” |
Locations
- On a desk in Esmeralda's House at X: 298 Y: 193
Related quests